What do I do?? Lots of stuff, like… uhh…

It’s a hard question because, well, most of my time is spent fixing what’s wrong, figuring out how to do what I need, making lists, shuffling through papers to find my lists, and trying to make up for lost time because I got distracted.

Oh, right. I also have doctors appointments, PT, my “cognitive aide” who helps me rein in my wandering executive functions, and that’s just the start. Visiting my mom twice a week, writing and re-writing, answering questions and trying to get answers, and – what I almost forgot (and often forget to do) – shopping for food, washing my hair, and occasionally seeing friends..

None of this sounds particularly productive or interesting, but it sure takes a lot of time. The highlights of a week in my life:

TOASTER: Broke. Spent days online & in stores picking a new one. 

blind broken      window-335607_960_720

WINDOW SHADE: Broke. I never got it fixed so the sun wakes me at the crack of dawn 

COMPUTER: Screwy and slow as molasses.
Two hours with 
AppleCare & still not right.prefs double imageIMG_1116-2



UH OH: One of my alarms if going off.. what am I supposed to be doing? 

Is it my phone, clock, tablet? And even more to the point… 

 alarm devices horiz 


11 thoughts on “What do I do?? Lots of stuff, like… uhh…

  1. Phil Vanaria July 15, 2016 / 12:29 am

    OML! Say the truth! This snapshot semi-humorously captures ‘a day in the life of a TBI’. I definitely identify with this chaos myself. Thanks for sharing.

    Liked by 1 person

    • laurienyc July 15, 2016 / 12:52 am

      When I don’t have words or anything profound I feel I can think of saying, I resort to the chaos of the moment. I thought it was just silly but now I’m getting comments…. All from people with BI.. Giving me a knowing thumbs up! That’s my kind of post. Thanks


  2. tracy wuischpard July 15, 2016 / 12:15 pm

    Thanks so much for sharing. I feel myself swimming through my to do lists and trudging through the day all too often. It’s good to have a project that is pleasurable on the list. I’ve been working on a film with a partner for 2 years now. Sometimes it goes smoothly and well, other times I lie on the couch in a daze unable to do the simplest thing. When the stress builds I become completely unable to go forward. Rest is good. Relaxation is also powerful. Just came back from the gym and my brain is feeling clear. A little elliptical and a little ping pong makes me smile. So simple and effective. Now – to work!

    Liked by 1 person

    • laurienyc July 15, 2016 / 3:12 pm

      I’m with you, Tracy. Creating a film, however long it takes, is certainly productive and creative. For me, taking photographs again after 10 years and writing TBI to LIFE are exhausting but also energizing. The writing is the most exciting because I’ve never done it before. And then getting feedback? what a great way to build a new life. Thanks for the support.


  3. Jasper Hoogendam July 17, 2016 / 10:40 pm

    Thanks for sharing. I’m looking at things I had hoped to do 3 weeks ago or longer and think, “How come I haven’t gotten around to doing that yet?” I’ve been told, “Pushing yourself to get things done at times is like pushing with a rope.” It just doesn’t work… it’s not designed to be used like that. Trying to do things the way I did before ABI doesn’t work … I’m no longer designed like that.

    Liked by 1 person

    • laurienyc July 17, 2016 / 11:49 pm

      Now, The harder I push the less efficient and effective I am. There are always some things on my list that are less time-sensitive. They get pushed down my TO DO list, until at some point I realize it’s okay to cross them off. Out of sight, out of mind. Letting go of things I want to do is counter-intuitive (my “before”, but I’m learning… What’s hard is that I can’t say at the end of the week -“I’ve accomplished something” (more than just that I managing to get through the week.


      • Jasper Hoogendam October 30, 2016 / 9:47 pm

        True to the topic of your post you made me chuckle because of the timing of your ‘like’ to my comment. It’s okay to take 3 months to get around to giving someone a nod about their comment.

        Liked by 1 person

  4. LaVon July 22, 2016 / 6:45 pm

    This is something you don’t get unless you have been there.
    I play solitaire to work on memory and speed. Since you can replay the same winning hand over and over if you want. I have had great improvement, but there are still very hard days. It seems like high stress, little sleep and weather effect my memory. So I don’t play on those days.

    Liked by 1 person

    • laurienyc July 23, 2016 / 12:21 am

      Everything seems to affect whatever it is we are struggling with at the moment. It also happens to people without brain injury but I don’t believe it’s the same. When we take something on – even if it’s simple – it takes minutes instead of seconds, hourse instead of minute, and the the days pass. Without an imposed structure in our life it’s really tough to schedule your own day and stick to it. On the other hand, as you say, if you don’t stick with it you’re only hurting yourself. Stay strong… and proactive. I admire that.


  5. Angela Leigh Tucker July 28, 2016 / 9:03 am

    This is hilarious, and more to the point… As I was trying to post this comment, I couldn’t find my own Word Press password and user. Our lives are made up of countless security codes and user names. How does one manage them all!?

    The Word Press password reminds me how long it’s been since I’ve updated my own website. I’m reuniting with nine incredible writers who I met at a retreat in Montana last year. I had hoped to prepare something to share for their invaluable input. But as each day seems to fill up on its own, I’ve taken that burden of responsibility off my shoulders. I leave for this reunion tomorrow.

    I feel one of the greatest parts of managing my to-do lists and full calendar is to allow myself the grace (and acceptance) of understanding it likely will not all get done. I’m learning to be okay with that fact, and trust that there will be another day of trying.

    Whoops, I’ve got to prepare for a brunch visit with my out-of-state God daughter and I’m still in bed…

    Liked by 1 person

  6. Susan Loyce October 25, 2016 / 4:50 am

    Sometimes it’s important to hear someone else articulate something you know viscerally but can’t describe. Thank you for that.

    Liked by 1 person

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