Karen: Andrew, can you please set up my shower bench, so I can take a shower? Andrew: I’m coming to the bathroom to help you out.Just Doing Something Ordinary
Karen Lambeck
I can get on the shower bench myself, I do not need help. [Uh! I just need a little break from this guy! He is always in my face! Always around!]
Andrew: I know what you’re thinking. But you know you can’t get on it by yourself. Slipping or falling just one time could hurt you very badly.[Should I be more cautious in my thoughts and actions? I am a little afraid that I will hurt myself, but not so scared I do not want to try. Of course I know it’s not safe, and I REALLY don’t want to risk an accident. Besides, if I did, Andrew would get so upset.]

[I have to remember to watch EVERYTHING I do–to stop and think about any movement I make. But it’s not natural which is why I often forget]
As I bend to turn on the water, I notice the bruises on my shins from all my accidental falls. I reach for the shampoo and it falls from my hands. I finally grasp it without dropping.[I give myself a “Thumbs Up” because I watched my hand pickup the bottle and never stopped watching until I had it.]
Now it’s time, at last, to open the top. After five attempts, with watching, I finally succeed. I manage to pour shampoo into my hand and put it on my hair. I rub the shampoo in with both my left and right hand. No, I do not condition my hair because it is very oily. My left hand isn’t as coordinated as my right, so sometimes I rub in again what I had already rubbed in with my left hand. I rinse out the shampoo several times, with the hot water coming from the shower head.[When the hot water drips from my hair it makes me feel as if I’m wrapped in my covers. I love that feeling so I tend to stay under the water for a while]
Now it’s time to get ready to wash my body. Thank goodness for Body Wash and a washcloth. I tried a bar of soap, but it just slides out of my hands.[it felt like a smooth skinned snake squirming through my hands]
I tend to squeeze too much on to the washcloth. Once I get my left hand underneath the bottle and grasping it with my right, I turn the bottle toward the washcloth while muttering to myself: While watching your every move, you can make a little bit go a long way. I turn off the water and spray the shower curtain liner with The Daily Cleaner. I know that others have their doubts but I really believe The Daily Cleaner works well. You just spray and walk away! Then I open the shower curtain and yell out, Ready and I’m finished! Andrew says that he is coming.[I ABSOLUTELY cannot stand waiting for him to come! I want to go in and out of the shower when I am ready, not when Andrew is ready to get me. But I have to admit, he usually is responsive]
After I’m handed the towel, I wipe my hair, face and legs dry. Andrew helps me put on my terry cloth robe (as my occupational therapist recommended).[The robe absorbs all the water dripping off me. It is soft and warm on my body and could cause me to fall asleep sitting up]
When my robe is on and tied, I swing my legs over the tub. Andrew guards me as I stand up.I was just doing something ordinary, but now I’m ready for a nap!
from Karen:
This all began with my first brain surgery, 45 years ago
…when a benign polycystic astrocytoma was removed from my cerebellum. That resulted in hydrocephalus (fluid accumulation in the brain) and required a shunt. I had to have a second surgery to put it in. Since then, I have had many neurosurgeries and related procedures to ensure the shunt functioned properly. And 20 years after those first two surgeries, while I was in the process of completing my Masters, the tumor recurred. All the medical interventions I’ve had resulted in severe coordination, fine motor and balance difficulties. I now require someone to be with me 24/7 to ensure I do not fall. But throughout this ordeal, the knowledge I acquired years ago when I earned my Masters Degree in Health Administration has helped me perform my duties while working at a hospital trade association.* Alfred Stieglitz, 1919. Georgia O’Keeffe – Hands. From the collection of The Metropolitan Museum of Art, licensed under CC0 1.0 Public Domain